300

Now that Reedus Season is on a hiatus until The Walking Dead returns it is time to move on to Fassbender Season.  The Bender Wagon has rolled into town and its first delivery is 300.

I originally reviewed 300 when it was released in the cinema however in order to embrace the arrival of said 'Wagon I have written a fresh blog for your enjoyment/general not giving a toss.

PLOT:  The thousand nations of the Persian army are descending upon Greece.  Leonidas, (Gerard Butler) the King of Sparta, leads his army of 300 to Hell’s Gate in order to hold off Xerxes and his fast approaching army of slaves.  The Spartans hold their position until they are betrayed by a Spartan outcast.  There are battles.  There are manly battle cries.  There are arrows which can blot out the sun.  There is blood. There is fighting in the shade.  There is a goat playing a sitar. There is much “swooning and fluttering”.  Contrary to popular belief only 299 die.  END PLOT

The plot of 300 is thinner than an Oracle’s dress but it doesn’t particularly matter as 300 doesn’t attempt to place itself up there with Gladiator. 

Gerard Butler yells his way through the film with a wonderfully unhidden Scottish accent.  This is one of my favourite Butler performances but I can’t work out if it is because he is good or bad or, in the same vein, if I have complimented or insulted him.

The supporting cast are fine and it goes without saying that Michael Fassbender is the best thing in the entire film – he gets the best lines and several decent set pieces. I have decided to keep hold of what little dignity I have left by refraining from gushing like a crazy idiot......after all a picture says a thousand words.....

  War wouldn't be so ugly if all soldiers used L'Oreal.

The running time of the film is surprisingly close to two hours although it never feels boring.  The pacing does dip dramatically when we head back to Sparta in order to allow the Queen (Lena Heady) to get involved with the politics of war but once action starts then the film finds its feet. 

The choreographed fight scenes suit the stylish feel of the film and although there is plenty of blood and some grotesque characters it never strays into that uncomfortably violent territory. 

The score is very loud and brash which works perfectly with the tone of 300 but it isn’t one I would ever listen to outside of the film.

I absolutely loved the 300 in the cinema but I never had any inclination to buy it on dvd as I didn’t think it would hold up well outside the cinematic experience.  I am pleased to report that when you turn the 5.1 up to the max it doesn’t lose any of the cinema factor.

If you look at 300 critically then there are flaws, for example, the dialogue ranges from cheesy to just god awful but overall there is just something about the film that I cannot help but love and it is a love which runs deeper than Fassbender’s CGI’d abs. 

300 gets respectably strong 8/10.  It very much a film which places style over substance but on occasion it's fun to get caught up in the noisy mayhem of semi-naked manliness and quite frankly if you don't agree then you are lying......