Thor: The Dark World

It is officially Week 8 of the Marvel-A-Week challenge. I confess, that I have skipped Iron Man 3 as I refused to buy it on Amazon Prime and for reasons, mostly, I suspect cynical, Amazon Prime have removed the rental option for quite a few of the Marvel films.

 

Thankfully Thor: The Dark World is a Netflix freebie and while my purse cries out with joy there is a very good reason for this.  The film sucks.

PLOT:  Set just after The Avengers, the Bi-Frost has been fixed and Thor (Chris Hemsworth) has brought peace to the nine realms, which apparently went to war with one another off screen.  Asgard’s tyrannical rule has been restored just in time for the Convergence, a 5,000 year cycle in which all the planets align and borders become blurred.  Coincidentally, Jane Foster (Natalie Portman) stumbles upon the long lost aether, which the Dark Elves, lead by Christopher Eccleston, now want back.  END PLOT

The plot for The Dark World isn’t ground breaking but it is harsh to say that it’s terrible.  The biggest problem I have with the film is the distribution of screen time. 

Apparently, the screen writers watched Thor and all they could take away from it was a misguided idea to give Darcy, the most unnecessary and pointless character in the history of fiction, a significant bump in screen time.  I hate the character.  I hate the way she talks. I hate the way she is the character to progress all the earth based plot points.  I hate that all her jokes fall flat.  I have no issue with Kat Dennings as I do not know the actress from anything other than the Thor movies but I absolutely hate everything about Darcy Lewis.  The only character more pointless than Darcy is her intern Ian, whose sole purpose is to give Darcy even more opportunities for witless quips.  I don’t understand the reasons behind this.  I cannot imagine, and refuse to even countenance a scenario in which people walked out of Thor thinking that the only way the franchise could get even better would be if there was at least 83% more Darcy. 

The increase in Darcy’s misplaced importance to the script didn’t do Jane Foster any favours.  Natalie Portman could have given so much more if Jane didn’t spend the entire film sporadically fainting and gasping into the distance.  Thor could have filled his favourite mead flagon with the aether and glanced at it occasionally to remind us that he had affection towards it and Jane would not have been missed at all.  The relationship between Thor and Jane is so uninteresting the passing mention of a mutual dumping in Ragnarok is more than it deserved.

As with all Thor films the scenes on earth are the weakest and, unfortunately, the most time consuming.  Thankfully the scenes on Asgard are what saves Thor from becoming a minor character in the Darcy ‘pause for the laugh track’ Lewis show.  The opening scene between Odin (Anthony Hopkins) and Loki (Tom Hiddleston) tricks the audience into thinking we are in for some strong Odin family drama but alas this is short lived.  The scenes in which any actor acts with Anthony Hopkins are the strongest but there are not enough of them.  The middle act with Thor and Loki’s escape from Asgard is the emotional heart of The Dark World and does justice to their characters.  Sadly, the tone shifts again and the big action based climax becomes a Scooby Doo like chase through the nine realms.  It’s awful.

Chris Hemsworth gives everything he has to the role but he struggles to be noticed amongst the earth based shenanigans and characters.  There is a reason the Thor franchise comes to life in Ragnarok.

Christopher Eccleston plays the main villain but he is unable to bring any menace or meat to the role.  Like, Natalie Portman, he gets completely shafted in favour of Darcy and Ian’s big adventure.  Odin is still a dick though, the script got that much correct and I am thankful for it.  The fucked-up family dynamic is the strongest part of the Thor franchise.

Thor: The Dark World had potential.  It cemented the perfect casting of the actors playing Asgardians but it squandered everything else.  The Dark World gets 5/10, only because the middle act saved it.  Without the strength of the Asgardian characters I do believe The Dark World would have killed the Thor franchise, and deservedly so.

Thor

I am on week4 of the Marvel-A-Week challenge that I have set myself and I am equal parts shocked and pleased that I have made it this far.

It was in no way a chore to sit down and watch Thor, as the brilliance of Thor: Ragnarok was still very fresh in my mind, and, my YouTube history will embarrassingly attest to the number of times I have watched the ‘Get Help’ scene.  However, I was burdened with inglorious worry.  I found myself feeling protective of Tony Stark, my least favourite Avenger, after watching Iron Man and Iron Man 2.  My contrary nature meant that there was a very real likelihood that I might not enjoy Thor.  I didn't, I loved it.

PLOT:  Thor (Chris Hemsworth) is banished to earth by his father Odin (Anthony Hopkins) after invading Jotunheim in a fit of foolish rage and almost breaking a longstanding truce.  While Thor is trying to adapt to human life, Asgard falls into disarray after Odin takes confrontation-avoiding-nap and his brother Loki (Tom Hiddleston) inherits the throne.  Thor must prove himself worthy of wielding his own hammer and return to Asgard to put his house in order.  END PLOT

Thor opens in Asgard, and we get to enjoy some Shakespearean family drama, before Thor is hurled to earth.  Once on earth, the tone shifts, and we are treated to some fish-out-of-water comedy and romance while Thor learns some valuable life lessons.  The plot beats are familiar, but the dramatic scenes are wonderfully acted and the comedy scenes are generally funny, so it’s a job well done.

What makes Thor stand out is its cast.  Chris Hemsworth is excellent as Thor, although the performances of Tom Hiddleston and Anthony Hopkins almost steal the movie from under him. I fully confess that Thor: Ragnarok kick started a much delayed Hiddleseason and I will subscribe to each and every fan theory which concludes that Loki is not a villain.  Thor may be the lead but there is no denying that Loki is the more interesting character.  I had forgotten that Loki let the Frost Giants into Asgard to derail Thor’s coronation and my own head-canon believes that Odin’s diplomatic response was because he knew that Loki did it.  This will be the only time I react positively to Odin, a man incapable of dropping life-changing bombshells without either sleeping or dying to avoid follow up questions.

The chemistry between Hemsworth and Hiddleston is what has made the relationship between Thor and Loki endure.  They bring out the best in each other and in their characters.  It’s easy to forget that Thor and Loki have been bickering their way through four movies and I am quite content to watch them bicker through four more.  The theories circling Infinity War suggest that won’t happen, but let’s be honest, was anyone really expecting Thor: Ragnarok to be such a huge hit?  I could murder Loki and watch him die in my own arms and I still wouldn't be 100% convinced he is dead. 

Anthony Hopkins is excellent as Odin and has the commanding presence required for such a huge personality and Idris Elba is the unsung badass of all three Thor movies.  The Asgardian supporting cast is excellent and it’s unfortunate that we don’t see more of them.  Down on earth, Natalie Portman is fine as Jane Foster and it's always surprisingly exciting when Clark Gregg pops up as the likeable Agent Coulson.  Gregg ties the Phase One movies together and I like that Coulson is the character who brings everyone together in the Avengers. 

The action scenes are fine but there are fewer than you might expect.  The tension comes from the dialogue various members of the House of Odin yell at each other, rather than any sense of physical danger.  It is a testament to the acting calibre of the cast that the big action scenes are not missed. 

Iron Man relies on the personality of Tony Stark and Captain America has the fractured friendship of Steve and Bucky as selling points, but my heart lies in Asgard.  I enjoyed everything about this film and as a trilogy, the Thor films are Marvel’s most consistent series.  Thor will forever hold a special place in my heart as it has the best, and most relatable, piece of dialogue in the entire Marvel series – ‘do not mistake my appetite for apathy’.  Even if I didn’t enjoy anything about Thor, it would get 10/10 for this line alone.   Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to destroy Jotunheim.

Thor

Despite being the proud owner of no less or more than 12 X-Men comics I am a real fan of all things Marvel and comic book adaptations in general with the exception of Superman which I never fully understood.

When Chris Evans was announced as Captain America I was super excited as he is my guilty pleasure actor and whenever The Avengers movie was announced I was even more delirious as it meant that Robert Downey Junior, Chris Evans and potentially Edward Norton would all be in the same film.

Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk and Captain America were all fine with me as they are based in the real world without any non scientific powers. I could never fathom how Thor would slot into this Marvel universe but there was never any doubt that I would be there to see this film.

PLOT: Thor (Chris Helmsworth) is banished from Asgard by Odin (Anthony Hopkins) after he is tricked by Loki into breaking a long held truce. Thor, now mortal, is sent to earth where he meets Jane (Natalie Portman) a scientist who is equal parts smart and hot. Thor’s hammer plays hard to get and SHIELD get involved. Hawkeye makes a cameo and Samuel L Jackson does not. The family turmoil continues until the big show down between Thor and Loki takes place. END PLOT

Iron Man 2 was an summer action flick with delusions of grandeur in that it had Stark's breakdown forced into the second act in an attempt to add some drama. In contrast Thor is a drama with some action scenes added in to keep the tension high.

I think the difference between the two lies with the director. Favreau is great at summer fluff but Thor went a different route and hired a Shakespearian actor/director (Branagh) to take the helm. This worked so well as the drama between fathers/sons and brother/brother was utilised to the full.

The family drama remained at the core of the movie but once Thor got to earth there were some genuinely funny fish out of water comedy moments. Thor’s expression of hunger (this mortal frame requires sustenance) has already been stolen by me and will be used to death. Thor managed to be equally light hearted and serious with neither feeling out of place.

Chris Helmworth is a big, lumbering, super muscled and tanned Aussie who shouldn’t have progressed further than Summer Bay but he is very good as Thor. He has the charm, looks and charisma of the late Heath Ledger and it was hard shaking this thought off during the film.

I love Natalie Portman in anything (except films which star Ashton Kutcher - I don’t love her that much) and she was fine in the usual female love interest role which required her to be totally uninvolved with the action.

Anthony Hopkins is perfect as Odin and effortlessly commands authority and respect from the people of Asgard and the audience.

The action is fun and there are a couple of nice little set pieces based in Asgard but the earth action scenes were the best.

I was worried about Thor fitting into The Avengers team before I saw the film. Now I am worried about The Avengers fitting in with Thor.

Thor had the potential to a camp cheesy wreck and I wouldn’t have been surprised if it went the same road as Clash of the Titans but as usual all my preconceptions were thankfully wrong. Thor is the strongest movie Marvel has produced in a long time.

I will be seeing Thor again before my Easter break is up - it has been a long time since I have watched a film twice in the cinema. The bar has been raised. Captain America has a lot to compete with and even the appearance of Chris Evans wont be enough to suffice.

Thor gets 9/10. I absolutely loved it.

Black Swan

It’s not often that a movie comes along that is virtually impossible to review based on a single viewing therefore today that wonderfully incompetent combination of lack of talent and lack of understanding will collide in order to created an even more incoherent than usual review - it is the turn of the Black Swan.

PLOT: Natalie Portman plays Nina a talented ballerina who has been given the coveted role of The Swan Queen in a new performance of Swan Lake. Things of course are not that simple as Nina a grown woman in her twenties lives in an apartment with her sinisterly overprotective and domineering mother but is in every sense of the word a child. Nina is able to play the innocent White Queen with ease but struggles when it comes to the darker Black Queen. After striking up a friendship with the new girl Lily (Mila Kunas) Nina starts to unleash her adult side and explore her sexuality which enables her to throw out her stuffed animals and get to know herself on an intimate level. As Nina gets to grips with adulthood and grows into her role as the Black Queen she becomes paranoid and believes that Lily is trying to steal her role. Nina’s mental state is called into question as she prepares for opening night and gives the performance of a lifetime. END PLOT

Natalie Portman is one of my favourite actresses and even before I watched the movie I was all for giving her the Oscar based on that reason alone but in the Black Swan she is simply fantastic. She plays the innocent Nina well and her transformation over to her darker side is just amazing to watch.

As good as Natalie Portman was she was almost out shone by Barbara Hersey who played Nina’s mother who was over bearing and down right creepy as the over protective parent. There were some very disturbing glimpses into their relationship which implied on occasions that the mothers relationship and obsession with her daughter was deeply inappropriate.

The supporting cast were all strong with the exception of the perennial weakest link that is Winona Ryder who popped up in a miscast cameo.

The plot was fine although it was Natalie Portman’s performance helped strengthen the usual “she is out to get me” side of the story. The Black Swan is more about Portman than plot.

I really liked that the colour was sapped and the hand held shaky camera helped to emphasise that Nina’s panic and paranoia. I loved ever present use of mirrors and that they were used to show the White Queen/Black Queen face off.

The Black Swan is the first Darren Aronofsky film I have ever watched and I’m impressed and I am sure that Mr Aronofsky will rest easy knowing this. I will finally give in and watch The Wrestler and Requiem for a Dream and all his other movies which don’t actually appeal to me but will now be given the benefit of the doubt due to Black Swan.

The Nerdy Trio left the Black Swan with one loving it, one hating it and the other on the fence - for a trio we managed to split ourselves right down the middle on this one but as the member who loved it I am the one who is correct.

The Black Swan is a great movie which follows the progression of a woman finally becoming an adult which ultimately leads to her to find freedom in the most tragic of ways……or it shows that masturbation leads to craziness either way it deserves to be viewed more than once to be fully appreciated. 9/10.